Instead of assuming that all things in life must be achieved through “hard work,” perhaps we imagine for a moment that the work can be easy, is easy, has always been easy.
It’s not a popular viewpoint. People love their struggle. People live for their struggle. But only because they think the struggle is the only way to reap desirable rewards.
Ever notice that when things come easy to you, and it feels good, you question its authenticity? Is this real? What did I do to deserve this? What’s this really gonna cost?
You start back-tracking for reasons how you willed it into place. You associate outcomes with your actions only, ignoring the part of you that is always attracting things, regardless of the work: your being.
By cherishing “hard work” as the only means to prosperity, we create a society that feels “owed.”
By cherishing “work,” even just by itself, we answer just one part of our nature—the part that believes it must “do” in order to achieve.
More important than the “doing” is the being. At least, at first.
If your being delights in struggle, you will attract opportunities that make it possible for you to struggle.
If your being delights in easy abundance, you will attract opportunities that make it possible for abundance to be easy.
But, Amanda, why would we ever delight in struggle? How could you say that? The struggle is HARD!
I know it is. But don’t you get some sort of satisfaction out of it? Some sense of strength and justice from your work that is “hard?” Look at the people who “have it easy.” How do we treat them? We call them Trust Fund Babies. We say they are shallow, and not as tough. We think less of them, because they seem to “have more” and didn’t “earn” it like we did, or must do. Life was “handed” to them. They aren’t survivors, like we are.
You see how glorifying struggle creates war? It justifies an “us” against “them” mentality. The people who have it easy versus the people who have it hard.
Those who have it hard do have it hard. They make life harder on themselves.
Those who have it easy do have it easy. They make life easier on themselves.
The variation of who has it hard and who has it easy, in this case, has nothing to do with outside circumstances, but perceptions of deserved circumstances. The attack-mind that worships struggle will not agree with a totally inclusive, collective “us.” Unity competes with their self-assigned worth. “Not just anyone can achieve what I’ve achieved,” they say. “This achievement was hard work! Do you know how much I’ve had to sacrifice to get here?”
Sacrifice exists because you think it has to.
In truth, your “sacrifice” is just a series of thought and actions that move in the direction of what is most important in your mind.
“But my parents gave up so much for me to have this life. Are you saying the sacrifice isn’t real? The struggle wasn’t real?”
I am saying that calling it “sacrifice” is a lie. Your parents decided that providing a certain kind of life for you was more important than whatever dream they had beforehand. So they moved in the direction of the new dream: you. What didn’t fit into your prosperity no longer fit into the idea of their prosperity. Was there longing involved? Were there tough days? Of course. Dreams test us. But the “tests” are not what make the dream worthy. The dream is worth it, all on its own. Why invite more struggle into the equation, believing that the struggle is what makes you whole, worthy, validated in your desires?
Moving away from the notion that we reap what we sow, and that what we sow has to be “so damn hard” can be painful. It means we have to take responsibility for how we’ve been running our lives. It means we can’t point the finger at anybody else. It means we must forgive our suffering. We must take suffering off the pedestal, and know that we can stand tall without calling upon it to give us a false sense of strength called pride.
Suffering when I don’t need to suffer doesn’t make me any stronger. Choosing not to suffer makes me stronger. Because it means that I am mentally and emotionally free to attract the lovely, easy things. I can perceive every moment as a gift, and not an unequal transaction. I can retain my sense of worth without making it depend on what I do. If worth depended on what I do, and not who I am, then why would I ever have been cared for as a child, incapable of “doing” anything but crying, eating, sleeping, dreaming, and puking on everyone?
Babies are cared for, not for what they do, but because of who and what they are.
Conversely, babies who are abandoned or hurt aren’t hurt for what they did (or didn’t do). They are abandoned or hurt because the parent didn’t understand how to care for who and what they are.
When people ask affluent people, “How did you get here?” and the affluent person says, “A lot of hard work,” they are just responding to an auto-pilot thought. They don’t even realize that, by saying that “hard work” got them there, they are affirming that work must always be hard to be rewarded. In reality, a LOT of factors got a person to where they are. We highlight the struggle to appear noble. To appear humble. And worse—to discourage people, subconsciously, from thinking they are “more equipped” than us. We want people to think it was hard, so they don’t attempt it, too, and surpass us.
Instead of highlighting the struggle, I wish people would say, “A lot of laughter got me here.” “A lot of cupcakes got me here.” “A lot of cursing got me here.” “A lot of loving people got me here.” “A lot of breathing got me here.” “A lot of believing in myself got me here.” “A lot of Figuring Shit Out got me here.” “A lot of other people’s money got me here.” “A lot of cool opportunities got me here.” “A lot of inspiration got me here.” “A lot of meditation got me here.” “A lot of following my gut got me here.”
The moment you realize the world is working in your favor ALL THE TIME, you will no longer need to cling to perceptions that your dreams have to be hard. Your dreams can be easy. You dreams can be fun and thrilling. If your dreams do not feel fun and thrilling, it’s time to either examine how you are going about your dreams. Or if the dream is one you actually want, versus one you think you “should” want, because it sounded good to someone else. Dream bigger, and dream better. Expect ease. Allow ease. Be ease. You are a dream, too, ya know. So work easy.