affirmations · business advice · inspiration · Uncategorized

Expanding Comfort Zones — The No-Nonsense Way

Business gurus like Ali Brown swear by the notion that your success, money, opportunity lies right outside your comfort zone.  In order to create different results, you must take different action.  Scary, close-your-eyes-and-hope-you-make-it action. I agree with this —there’s an insane bustle of energy right outside the perimeters of what you find cozy, that often propels you into wild&exciting new motion.  It’s like breathing in fresh air of the outdoors after being in flight for ten hours. Intoxicating!

While the speech tags to move outside your comfort zone make you nod your head, “yes,” implying you should do exactly that, it doesn’t provide a clear path of how to move outside your zones, and thus, expand them.

A technique I use is pretty simple.  In moments of fear, where my body is physically shaking in my Winter boots, I do some serious self-talk.  DIRECTLY TO MY COMFORT ZONES.  As if my comfort zone was a gatekeeper, with one job: to keep me safe.

In this scenario, “safe” means “familiar.”  The gatekeeper deems everything I’ve been through—even if it produced yucky results—as familiar territory.  I’ve lived it.  I’ve survived it.  What’s the problem?

The problem is deciding that familiar is safe.  Safety, when it is dependent on external stimuli, is always an illusion.  The truth is:  you are ALWAYS safe.  No matter the circumstance.

Try teaching your ego that concept.  It will cringe and writhe and just throw more “threats” into your imagination.

There’s a way to tactfully embrace this necessary change, however.  And the result is a TRUE expansion of your comfort zone, not a temporary one that is based on circumstance.

Talk with your ego. Gently. As if your ego was a child you are caring for.  You see the big fear in his or her eyes, watery with doubt that you could ever be bold enough to brave the “unknown.” Hold your ego’s hand.  Metaphysically.  Be tender to your self.  Say, “Hey, ego, I know this is scary, but I have to let you know something…we’re safe. I can’t believe how safe we are!”  It’s your higher mind talking with your lower mind.  “Hey, ego, I know this might feel scary right now, but remember: there’s nothing we can’t do! We have ALL the tools necessary to feel secure, accomplished, and free.  No one is judging us.  No one thinks we are incapable.  In fact, everyone and everything here supports the notion that this decision is 100% perfectly in alignment with our goals and capability.  It’s amazing how protected we are here.”

Suddenly, the tension eases.  Your shoulders relax.  The voice that usually screams, “Go home and hide!” is saying, “Okay, I can trust this.  You’re right! Maybe we are safe.”

If fear creeps back up, keep talking.  Keep comforting the fearful child that your ego portrays.

“Even though I feel so afraid, I know that there’s a reason I’m here.  I know that by stepping into this opportunity, more opportunities will appear that will lead to the life I’ve been aching for.  I am secure in love, and faithful that, no matter what—even if I do something stupid—all is perfect.  All is blissful and blessed.”

Continue to breathe and consider that you’re 100% capable.  Expansion is natural.  You are expansive enough.

4 thoughts on “Expanding Comfort Zones — The No-Nonsense Way

  1. This is a very interesting blog post. I love your perspective on this subject; I often struggle with this myself. As someone with a literary blog, I admire your style of writing, including your nuances and your subtle dialogue. Great post!

    1. Thank you! That’s inspiring, especially coming from someone who blogs for/about The Paris Review! In my own journey of submitting to magazines and journals, The Paris Review is one I greatly admire, but have yet to send any work to, out of my own ego’s impish fear! “Only established, known, elite authors get published in The Paris Review.” Thanks for bringing this silly little mantra into my awareness, ha. As you probably know, anything is possible. 🙂

      Many blessings & breakthroughs.

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